Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Following the arrest last week of the local Mayor, there is now the very real possibility of a special election being held to fill his spot should he resign, or be incarcerated. I have been flattered, and to a certain extent stunned, to learn that in some quarters my name has been put forward to run for public office in the event that a special election is called. My supporters cite my unparalleled experience with "change" making me perfect for the job. However, my opponents have rightly pointed out that I have a long and well documented record of handling "dirty money" and that may be a major stumbling block on my route to City Hall (or not in these parts!).
As humbled as I am at the suggestion, below are the reasons why it can't happen:
1. I'm apolitical, and with no affiliation to the Democrats or Republicans it would be very tough to run as an Independent.
2. As of the time of posting my "war chest" to fund a run for public office stands at $14.64 (although I hope to find a little more before the election).This is not nearly enough in today's cash infused political environment.
3. My non-negotiable stance about applying commonsense to all decisions will, in all likelihood, be very poorly received in political circles.
4. If I ever try to cut the budget for street cleaning my opponents will immediately cry, "Conflict of interest!".
5. This blog was written to teach Sidewalker Jr. and Little Miss Sidewalker about the value of money, and not to be a launchpad for any political machinations!
-Luke Sidewalker (For Mayor)
-Current balance $14.64